Friday, October 22, 2010

walking on sunshine

Good morning and happy Friday, fellow Twitlossers!

I didn't really have anything to talk about today, because the evil that is Girl Time hasn't gone away yet. This is the 2nd week, and while the cramps and general "OhmyGodkillmenow" feeling has gone away, Aunt Flo has refused to leave the building... The bitch. And yes, I know you can work out during Girl Time, but I don't. After getting my IUD (and later having it removed), I can't do tampons anymore, and working out while wearing a pad makes me feel disgusting.

I know, excuses.

This isn't actually what I was going to talk about today. I wanted to talk about depression and how it affects your weight. For me, I'm an emotional eater. If I'm sad, I eat. If I'm angry, I eat (after I throw things & curse a lot). If I'm happy, I eat. It's a horrible, vicious cycle that has added entirely too many pounds & inches to my ass.

I'm bipolar, so I have manic highs and manic lows. Not a pretty sight to be around when I'm in a downphase. I cry a lot, I eat a lot, and I don't get out of bed much. So, how I do deal with the depression? How do I pull myself out of the funk?

Over the years, I've developed a few different methods.
  • Music - I love music, so I have a playlist that's designed specifically to get me back into my "happy" place. I also use it as my "WAKE UP!" mix in the mornings when I crawl into the shower. I have songs like "(I feel good) I got you" by James Brown, "Respect" by Aretha Franklin, "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves... Up beat, happy music.
  • Journaling - Keeping a journal helps too. I write out every thought & feeling I'm having at the time and when I'm done, I put it away. I don't read the entries again. You know that "out of sight, out of mind" trick? That's kind of what I'm trying to accomplish with the journaling. I get it out & set it aside.
  • Going outdoors - Even though I'm not really much of an outdoors type of girl, I found that getting outside and soaking up some sunshine does me a lot of good. Last semester, when I wasn't working, I found myself getting more and more down, the more I stayed home. When I took Monkey to daycare/pre-school, I noticed a dramatic change in my energy level and overall level of happiness... getting outside and being in the sun actually boosted my spirits.
  • Playing with my kid/spending time with my family - If you're on my Twitter, you know that I adore my kid (how can I not? She's precious & sweet & funny). So, hanging out with her when I'm down also serves to lift me up. She makes me laugh & if I feel like crying, she crawls into my lap and gives me hugs & kisses until I'm better. If that's not enough, I crawl into PK's lap and he holds me until I'm happy again. And if all else fails, I go see my mom. I can't crawl in her lap anymore, but I can lay down next to her, and she'll play with my hair and tell me funny stories about my aunts & uncles until I'm laughing so hard I think I might actually pee on myself (my mom's hilarious).
  • Baking - I know, it's not very Twitloss friendly, but I love to bake. Love it. The act of putting a recipe together, measuring out the ingredients exactly (I only measure when I bake - when I cook, all bets are off), mixing it, & seeing how it comes out of the oven... it's soothing to me. You can usually tell when I've had a rotten day, because I tend to bake a lot when I'm upset. My neighbors actually kind of love it when I have a bad day because they get a ton of sweets (I can't keep them in the house -- emotional eater, remember?)
  • Reading - Of course I love to read when I'm down. I usually pick something that's not too angsty (ex: HQ romances - the sekrit baby kind, lol) so it doesn't drag me down even further.
  • Cleaning - I know I'm weird, but I actually like to clean. I put on my "Clean the house" playlist that's got a bunch of Britney Spears, Lady Gaga, Beyonce, etc. type music and get moving. You can really tell when I'm in a funk because the house smells like bleach and looks all sparkly & shiny.
They're not all guaranteed to work. Sometimes I just need to ride out the funk until it goes away. I once spent an entire month in bed, only getting up when I absolutely had to. Luckily, that hasn't happened in almost a year, and I'm getting better at pulling myself out of the funk.

This week's question: Do you battle with depression? How do you pull yourself out of a funk?



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